What’s Happening…?

I usually don’t write politically charged articles so here goes nothin!

Alright folks, you’re about to get my opinion on all the Nazi BS going on in the country lately, even though you didn’t ask for it. I feel bad for the future students of APUSH 2070, they’re going to think 2017 was a JOKE.

First off, yes, I am aware that racism and white supremacy/anti-Semitic people/groups existed in this country before Trump was president.  Hate and racism has unfortunately been a part of this country for years, BUT, it didn’t have the public support platform that it does now.

The fact that the Tiki torch company that produced the torches carried in Charlottesville denounced the violence and actions of the neo-nazis before our own president did is sad. The fact that a white supremacist drove his car through the crowd and killed a young woman, but blame is being placed on “both sides”, is pathetic. There is one side and it is evil.  And yes, I am going to call that act by James Alex Fields Jr. what it is, it is domestic terrorism. That word should scare you. And sure, there was violence carried out by the “alt left” as well. But comparing someone driving a car through a crowd to someone holding a club is preposterous.

And before a bunch of people hop all over this, the “alt-right” are the second deadliest terrorism group in the U.S. over the past 25 years, second only to Islamists. source.

As far as confederate monuments, all I have to say is yes, that is a part of our history, but you don’t see Germany making their citizens go to Hitler High School. It is important for everyone to be educated on the history of this country, but idolizing figures of oppression is not necessary. We have to realize that saying “it’s part of history, it doesn’t affect me” is the definition of white privilege.

At this point, it is not a party issue, it is beyond a race issue, it is a humanity issue. If you do not denounce the white supremacy ideal, you are a white supremacist. And this president is giving the alt-right a platform to thrive. Change starts with you and me. Just yesterday morning a semi truck in front of me on the highway had a swastika drawn on the back of it. So please, to be candid, spare me the bullshit. Our country is not fine. Our president is not progressive. Clinton would NOT have been worse than this. This is not the USA I grew up in, and this is NOT the USA I would want to raise kids in.

If you need me, I’ll be attempting to build a nuclear bomb structure. North Korea, if you’re reading this, please spare me, thanks.

Until next time,

-N

Twitter: @nblais45 Insta: _nikkiblais

courtesy of buzzfeed via Jeff Kandyba

Time to Get Serious

If you were looking for another Bachelorette article, you have come to the wrong place (stay tuned though). Today, I’m going to tackle a more serious issue and get a little personal, so sit down, buckle up, and enjoy.

*DISCLAIMER: If you haven’t gathered by now, I am a raging feminist, and if you are not/think I’m wrong, I think you’re wrong and you’ll probably get mad at this blog and should stop reading. *insert angry meninist here*

ANYWAY…

I have been following the Taylor Swift groping case because 1) I have no life and 2) I am overly interested in the lives of celebrities. In case you don’t know what happened, here’s a quick summary. Taylor Swift is alleging that in 2013 during a meet and greet that a radio DJ grabbed her ass. When these allegations got out, the DJ was fired from his job (rightfully so). The DJ decided to sue T-Swizzle for defamation and wants up to $3 million. *important to note, Swift did not initiate this lawsuit* Instead of letting this go, Swift is countersuing for $1. No that is not a typo. It is clearly not about the money for Swift, it is about letting men know all over the world that you cannot just grab a woman’s ass???

Before I get to T-Swift’s absolutely BAD ASS responses to questioning in court, let’s talk about the issue of victim blaming. As I drove to work Friday morning, I was listening to a morning talk show on a local radio station as they discussed this matter. The host of the show. who is a man, said how he doesn’t think Swift will win because there isn’t enough evidence. He then asked why Swift “didn’t just move the guy’s hand” off her ass. A female on the show chimed in to share a couple experiences in which her/her friends’ asses were un-welcomingly grabbed by men and how your first instinct is to not to anything. She explained “you don’t know who’s around, who this guy is, what power he has, or how he might react violently, so you kinda just freeze”. The men on the radio show immediately told her she was wrong. Literally told her that the experiences and reactions she and her friends’ had had were wrong. ……WHAT?…..

This leads into my main issue: what is it with the victim blaming. It is NOT Swift’s fault that a man grabbed her ass. It is NOT her fault that he immediate reaction wasn’t to swat the guy’s hand away (which I’m sure TMZ would’ve had a field day with). It is NOT any woman’s fault that she was sexually or physically assaulted. And y’all wonder why women don’t report this stuff? This is why.

From my own experience, it’s easy to fall into thinking this kind of stuff is your fault. One night after a night downtown at the bars, I was sober and tired and wanted to go home. I took it upon myself to leave alone and call an Uber. I thought if I walked up the street to a nice hotel, I would be safer and have a better chance getting an Uber. As I walked up the street, I was grabbed by a man in an alley who I assume wanted my purse. S/O to Sandra Bullock, because I SING-ed my way out of there, but not before he (minorly) cut my face with his knife. I was lucky. But it’ll take a lot more than a knife to rip me away from my Kate Spade purse. But after all this, as I heard myself explaining to people what happened, I heard myself blaming me. “I shouldn’t have left alone” “It’s my fault, I should’ve walked a different way” NO NO NO. It is not my fault, it is never the victim’s fault. Stop telling people, especially women, that it is their fault something happened to them.

Unfortunately for this DJ, T-Swift did not react as I did, and is not having this lawsuit at all. When asked if she was critical of her bodyguard not stopping the groping, Swift said  she is not critical of her bodyguard: “I’m critical of your client sticking his hand under my skirt and grabbing my ass.” When asked if she could see the incident directly Swift said she couldn’t see exactly because her “ass in the back of her body.” When asked if she was open to the possibility that it was someone else. “He had a handful of my ass. I know it was him.” On Mueller’s (the DJ) firing Swift said “I am not going to allow your my client to make me feel like it is anyway my fault because it isn’t.”

*Testimony quotes courtesy of  Claudia Rosenbaum of Buzzfeed News’ Twitter

giphy

There’s witnesses, there’s a victim, and there’s a picture, and people STILL think he’ll get off. I’ve honestly seen more support for R.Kelly in whatever alleged sex slave ring he’s running than Taylor Swift in this matter and I am confused.

To sum up: I’m fightin’ with ya T-Swift.

If you would like to see the photo of the alleged ass grab, go here .

Until next time,

-N

Twitter: @nblais45 Insta: _nikkiblais

And the Bachelor is….

Alright. Sorry in advance for two Bachelorette blogs in a row but after Monday night, how can I not??

If you’re like me, you’re still reeling from the absolutely devastating moment that was Rachel and Peter’s break up. I think it takes the cake for most gut wrenching, real, raw moment in the history of the show. Watching that happen was almost as disappointing as when they announced Nick was the Bachelor last year. Rachel literally cried her eyelashes off for Peter, hell, I cried my eyelashes off and I wasn’t wearing fake ones.

I mean, in the real world, what Peter was saying is totally normal. If a guy proposed to me after 2 months and like 5 dates, I would be slightly alarmed, but that’s not how the Bachelorette works. We know he’s seen the show since he wrote in his high school yearbook that he wanted to “be on the Bachelor”, so it should be no shock what is expected of him at the end. And imagine being Rachel. She went on the Bachelor wanting to get engaged and got her heart broken. Imagine doing that process all over again and STILL not being engaged. I wouldn’t want that. Whether or not you think she settled for a ring, I think it’s undeniable that she has love for Bryan.

But now the fun part: who will be the next Bachelor?? It should be Dean, but they sent him to Paradise, and according to spoilers, he has a girlfriend-ish thing. ABC could continue it’s “firsts” and have the first Bachelor in Eric. Eric really came out of his shell at and after hometowns, and I think we definitely slept on him too long. And TBH, that beard is WORKING. Rachel and Bryan were both quoted saying they think the Bachelor should be week-six-send-home Alex, ya know, the beautiful Russian man who deserved more time because yum.

Now as far as who it shouldn’t be; I will be really disappointed in ABC and the Bachelor himself if it’s Peter. After the tear fest of Peter saying he needs more time and breaking both Rachel’s and my heart, he can’t turn around and be the Bachelor. He, like most of America, probably isn’t cut out for the 3 month engagement thing, but don’t take that stand on TV and then sell out for money/fame/whatever. But I am also a sell out because if they make him the Bachelor I will still watch because yum.

But for now, I’m looking forward to the epic drama that is Bachelor in Paradise. And I’ll probably write blogs about that too because duh.

p.s. @ABC, I write so much about your shows, can I get a sponsor? No? Okay.

Until next episode,

-N

Twitter: @nblais45 Insta: _nikkiblais

 

Let’s Talk about The Bachelorette

*Disclaimer: if you are not up to date, there will be spoilers ahead.

I have recently become a slave to Bachelor Nation, watching each episode religiously as it pops up on Hulu. And I have to say, after Nick Viall’s season had me questioning my loyalty to the franchise, Rachel Lindsay has reaffirmed me as a believer. She is a confident, beautiful, bad-ass African American woman, who also happens to be a lawyer. She is the kind of woman you want your kids to look up to. The men this season are A+. They make me melt like a popsicle on the 4th of July.

This past episode was hometown dates featuring Bryan, Peter, Eric, and real life Ken Doll Dean, who has talked several times about the tumultuous relationship he has with his family, his father in particular. Since the episode aired, there have been several articles and tweets saying that ABC and the Bachelor took advantage of Dean’s situation for ratings and forced him into something he didn’t want to do. People are also angry that after “airing out his dirty laundry”, Rachel sent him packing.

I have to say, I usually love reading articles about Bachelor gossip, but on this particular week, I completely disagree with everything.

Let me start by saying, Dean completely won me over. He seems like a great person and his face has been sculpted by the gods. But let’s not pretend Dean didn’t know what he was signing up for. The Bachelorette has been on for 13 seasons now. It is no secret what happens. Contestants for as long as can be remembered, if they make it to the final four, have to bring the Bachelorette to their hometown. I relate to him so much as I have an awful relationship with my dad and I wouldn’t want that aired out either, but I didn’t sign up for a reality show. And let’s not pretend like the Bachelor or any reality TV for that matter has ever been overtly moral. With that being said, we also know what we are signing on for when we watch the show. You can angry tweet about how much this bothered you all you want, but if you go back next week and watch the final 3, your tweets mean absolutely nothing.

Don’t get me wrong, it was totally raw and emotional and maybe pushed the boundaries of TV, but that’s how it’s always been. And while I am surprised that ABC let Rachel send Dean home after all that, I don’t blame her if she had stronger feelings for the other men. Whether the show and the drama is fake or not, the feelings, the proposal, and the eventual (maybe) wedding are real, and we cannot expect Rachel to marry a man just because we feel bad for him.

With all this being said, @Dean, I am available.

-N

Twitter: @nblais45 Insta: _nikkiblais

Travel Bug

I don’t know where this travel bug came from, but it’s starting to stress me out.

When I was in middle school, and even early on in high school, I never thought I would move from my hometown. In fact, in middle school, I couldn’t even fathom the idea. I remember one girl in my middle school whose family up and moved to California. Like…what? How do you just pick up your life and move across the country? How do you just completely start over? Little did 12 year old me know that I would be doing the same thing 7 years later, except I would be going south instead of west.

And let me tell you, it was as hard as I imagined. Luckily for me, most of the burden of selling the house and buying a new house fell on my mom (thanks Tasha), but it was still no walk in the park. I get bored and frustrated having to pack for a 5 day vacation, so imagine me having to pack up my entire life. It was awful! But not as bad as it was to unpack. Pretty sure I dragged that out as long as I could though, at least a month. And since then, I’ve had to move in to my Belmont dorm, and then out two semesters later; into a townhouse, and then out 12 months later; back into my mom’s house, and then out 3 months later; and into my current apartment, and out in about two months. So you could say I’ve done my fair share of moving. And fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, it doesn’t really faze me anymore.

Since I’m graduating in December, I need a real job to support my borderline gambling and shopping (and tattoo) addiction. The prospect of maybe moving to California to work for The Giving Keys or Maryland to work for Under Armour doesn’t rattle me in the slightest, and it should. Yes, I am a bit ahead of myself because I don’t even have my degree in hand yet, but I need to somehow get out of this fantasy world of being able to pick up and move to LA.

If anyone has a cure for travel bugs, LMK!

Reporting to you live from Nashville (for now),

-N

P.S. If you want to follow me on social media, feel free, I’m funny sometimes

Insta: _nikkiblais        Twitter: @nblais45

 

 

Update: I Don’t Know What I’m Doing

Surprise! I’m back from hiatus. I wish I could say I was busy but I’m pretty sure I was just being lazy.

Anyway, we’re about midway through summer, I’m almost done with summer classes, and the fact that my final semester at Belmont is about to start is setting in. And as you can see from the title, I have no idea what I’m doing.

I know I’ll pass all my classes in the fall, so at least I can count on graduating, what comes after that is uncertain. My genius self wanted to move to Nashville, and while I don’t regret it for a second, Nashville is growing like crazyyyyy. And that means astronomical rent prices and intense competition for jobs. So that will be some panic that I’ll live with for the next couple of months. Looking forward to it!

I mean, it’s hard enough to get an internship around here! I have a pretty decent resume, and if the experience isn’t enough, it’s very well designed (shoutout to canva), I write competent cover letters, my interviews go well (I think?). I do that thing where you get super nervous and black out during public speaking scenarios. And yet I still find myself struggling to get an internship, so I can’t imagine how tough the post-grad job market will be.

But after sitting with what feels like failure all summer, I realized it is anything but failure. Simply getting interviews is an accomplishment in itself. These companies obviously see something great in you, and that should never be counted as a failure. I refuse to believe that after 4.5 years of college and tens of thousands of dollars later that the universe won’t work things out. I will end up where I am supposed to be. I just hope that place is a job with good benefits and paid vacation 😉

Will I graduate? Will I be employed? Will I be living in a box on Belmont’s lawn? Stay tuned!

Until next time,

-N

In Conclusion…

Well folks, I survived my trip to Daytona Beach! It was an amazing trip with even better people, and even better food. There’s nothing quite like going to bed with salty hair, and waking up knowing when you walk out of your room you’ll be right back on the beach. I’m even thankful for the sunburn, no matter how unpleasant it was at the time.

I did learn some things though:
1. 30 SPF is not enough for the Florida sun

2. If you’re going to drive more than 8 hours, have 4 people, or fly

3. Three days was not long enough

Daytona has a piece of my heart, and all of my money. Thanks for the all you can eat crab, mini golf, airbrushed tanks, and $1 jello shots.

Now its time to go back to real life. But, hey, real life ain’t so bad either.

Until after I recover

-N

Daytona Sundaze

Well friends, family, and random people on the internet. We definitely used our first day in Daytona as a learning experience. That tan that I thought I had quickly turned into a burn as soon as I got out of the shower.  So the three of us all sat in bed with aloe covering our leathery burnt skin: mistake number one. Mistake number two, we all underestimated how tired we would be, so we fell asleep, essentially for the night at 5:30 pm. And no that is not a typo, though I wish it was. And to add insult to injury, we slept through breakfast.

We redeemed ourselves shortly after though. No breakfast? No problem, ice cream for breakfast. Burnt? Use an entire bottle of sunscreen and sit in the shade all day. Watch 4 people get stuck in riptides? Ride those waves like we’ve been doing it our whole lives.

It’s been an A+ day here in Daytona, and tonight we’re actually going to make it to the boardwalk and go LIVE. And we’ll probably eat 2 dinners, because if your friends don’t  accept the fact that you eat pre-dinner and dinner, than that’s not the kind of people you want in your life.

We’re going to do tonight right. Stay tuned.

Until next time

-N

*this post has been brought to you by aloe*

(Day)tona 1

So as some of you may know, I made the wise (?) decision to embark on an adventure to Daytona Beach for Fourth of July weekend. Well, as of 9:00am, we made it! Was it easy? No. I severely underestimated how long a 10 hour drive was. But after beaching it for 5 hours, it’s already worth it.

We were all antsy yesterday; I was getting repeated texts from Nicci saying that she didn’t know what to do with her life until we left, and neither did I. So, we killed time at Hooters, playing Mario Kart, and after a last ditch effort to get Erin to come, we hit the highway for Daytona.

The first 4 hours of the drive were great, music was blasting, we were having lively conversation, it was great! Then hour 5, 6, 7, 8 draggggged on. It was miserable. I was so tired that my brain was involuntarily putting me to sleep. We almost died 6 times, I take the blame on that one, sorry fam. But then we hit Florida, and it was like a whole new person. I was ready. The miles on the signs for Daytona Beach decreased, 75, 65, 22. We hit the bridge that crossed over the ocean to get to our hotel, and as soon as the light turned green, DJ Nicci herself blasted Somethin Bad, and we were here. Summa Sixteen.

After a day frying on the beach, I am happy to report that I may be the tannest I’ve ever been (thank you Florida sun), and Nicci is perhaps the burnt-est she’s ever been, and Jay somehow missed out on the burn. Day 1 has been, as the kids say, “lit”, be on the lookout for us going LIVE from the boardwalk later 😎.

Until next time

(which will be tomorrow)

((wish us luck))

-N

A Growth Year

Well friends, as we approach July, I have found myself reflecting more and more everyday on the past year I had at Belmont and the events surrounding. Now let me warn you, if you are expecting this happy-go-lucky story filled with rainbows and unicorns, then I suggest you go elsewhere. We are about to get real.

Pre-fall 2015, I was beyond excited for the school year. I had just been initiated into Phi Mu and the people I had called my best friends were all of a sudden my sisters. We went almost right into recruitment, and I was so excited to be in a room full of my sisters. Now let me tell you, staying up til 4am, then going home and sleeping until 7am just to get up and do it again, ain’t all it cracked up to be. It was rough, and my relationships felt it. The weeks to follow were….interesting. I somehow managed to trip on stairs juuuust right and tear my quadricep muscle. My semester of frolicking with new friends quickly changed to me sitting in my room, barely able to make it down the stairs and get food. Needless to say, I was in a funk.

A couple months and long hard talks later, I was back on track, Christmas was around the corner, and spring semester was closely approaching. I did the typical thing that everyone does when the new year comes around: “this is going to be my year, 2016 is my year”. For a while, I thought I was right. I actually knew what I was doing in my classes, I was more involved in Phi Mu than I ever had been, and I had blossoming relationships that I was so excited about. Side note: I usually let myself get caught up in the glitter of good things, and not realize that underneath all the shine and glitter is just a dull sac of rocks. Anyway, back to the story….I was making relationships because they were convenient, not because they were what I wanted. So I found myself, sitting in my bed in my former Wedgewood townhouse, thinking to myself “welp, my best friend is leaving for the summer, this is going to be a fun summer with my mom living at home #party”.

Then, the craziest thing happened, so suddenly that I didn’t even realize it happened until now. I was a part of a group of people, who all genuinely love and care about each other. It’s just easy, and spontaneous, I mean hell, we all went and got tattoos together the other night (sorry mom and grandma, surprise!). This is something I have needed for a long time, and now I have it. I am lucky.

All of this is useless if I don’t tell you what I’ve learned. ONE: friendship ain’t easy, it’s the people who stick around when you look like a drowned rat in a puddle of tears you want in your life. TWO: always, always, always count your blessing, not your problems, it’ll put you in a much better mindset. And finally, be patient, don’t force things to happen, they will happen naturally, and you will end up where you need to be.

Until next time

(considering my mom lets me live after the bomb I just dropped)

-N